Improving Relationships

Would anyone like a little guidance on how to navigate your relationships that seem hard?

Being triggered never feels good and how we respond can make all the difference. What do you think? Do you ever feel frozen in your experience and not know what to say? Or get so angry that you yell at the top of your lungs? But then what?

This 2-minute read offers some tools to help you respond in a way that may feel better for you.

"Difficult conversations, challenges and obstacles are put in our path not to stop us, but to teach us, help us grow and call on our own love, courage, and strength." Shelley Marenka

Here are some tools you can try that I've used to help me respond in a healthier way. I don't know if they'll work for you but perhaps it's worth a try. Will you let me know how it goes?

Life is such a learning platform! lol

It's a funny thing that humans do. For example, when we are in a conversation and it begins to feel uncomfortable, oftentimes we experience a memory, physical sensation, or emotion, that can set us off, making us feel irritated, frustrated, anxious or sad, even mad.

When these types of feelings arise when we are engaging with another person it can feel like we just got hit with a baseball. You may feel like you want to flee or freeze! It's a common human experience to want to run away from the confrontation or feeling of discomfort and hope that the issue just goes away.

You and I both know what happens after that if we run away. The feelings and emotions don’t go away. They continue to fester even if we sweep them under the rug, and often times the emotion will come out worse a.k.a. sideways.

My experience has been that if you don't run from it, and you bravely and courageously run to it in love, then you'll both win the mental and emotional game.  You'll project less often when you are aware of its source, and listening to your inner voice will always guide you in the right direction.

Running from it is what I would refer to as being ‘reactive’. Resisting what is. Reactivity is a method of resistance.

When we ‘react’ this behavior creates disharmony, we can feel unregulated and resistant, and this can leave us feeling sad, hurt and frustrated, and feeling imprisoned from a life of flow and alignment.

Newton's third law is: “For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. The statement means that in every interaction, there is a pair of forces acting on the two interacting objects. The size of the forces on the first object equals the size of the force on the second object.”

If you can choose to look at these situations differently, with love courage, and strength, you may learn that it is something that is beckoning your attention, your love, and your willingness to change. Maybe your inner child needs some TLC. Maybe your woundedness is wanting attention.

When you are aware, you can act and respond by choice versus reacting or resisting because you are triggered.

"Resistance is about believing that you are vulnerable or susceptible to something not wanted and holding a stance of protection — which only holds you in a place of not letting in the Well-being that would be there otherwise. There is nothing big enough to protect you from unwanted things, and there are no unwanted things big enough to get into your experience." Abraham Hicks

Perhaps next time, you can be aware and act with kindness towards yourself and others, versus react and resist.

Perhaps the situation needs some time.

Perhaps it needs unpacking.

Perhaps the situation needs forgiveness.

And most of all, perhaps the situation simply needs a little love to help it along.

Next time you feel like 'running from it' or immediately reacting to the situation, see if you can create awareness, courage, and strength around the situation and choose something different.

You are loved. And you've got this!

PS I'd love to hear your thoughts or comments on this topic.

Please feel free to post what you like in the comments below.

#mindset #triggered #reaction